woman: wow this is a great closet but where will we put my husband’s clothes? ha ha ha
The realtor laughs forcefully at Wife’s closet jokes. He is so tired. Husband and Wife remind the realtor that this house doesn’t have that 7th bedroom they are looking for while also being a downtown apartment with a view. The realtor nods and assures them that their dream home is out there. His platitudes disgust even himself. A laugh track plays when Husband remarks that the kitchen will be perfect for Wife. Husband brags that he does not know the difference between a washing machine and an oven, and the laugh track plays on. Did this show always have a laugh track? The realtor no longer knows. He laughs along with the invisible crowd, broken and alone.
Slytherins tend to be ambitious, shrewd, cunning, strong leaders, and achievement-oriented. They also have highly developed senses of self-preservation. This means that Slytherins tend to hesitate before acting, so as to weigh all possible outcomes before deciding exactly what should be done.
this doesn’t fit my blog at all but i had to post it here because this story is legit the wildest thing i’ve seen this month and everyone needs to see it. unmute this I PROMISE YOU WON’T REGRET IT
omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was good for a while, being empty. I didn’t hurt anymore. But as time went on, it was like I could hear myself from far away, begging for permission to come back.
somebody could literally make the funniest joke in the universe, expertly crafted and hand made like a fine artisan cheese, but it’ll never make me laugh as much as that one fucking comic where goofy steals a hat from himself in a different panel and defies all logic and starts crying
fivepercent 