i just read a washington post article on romcoms aging poorly due to the pushiness (and oft-stalkery conduct) of the male characters therein, and it got me thinking about pride and prejudice, and specifically darcy saying, “one word from you will silence me on this subject forever.”
because, like, that’s the seldom-portrayed romantic dream in the patriarchal hellscape that is our world, isn’t it?
a dude being willing to say, “i understand if you don’t feel the same way about me, and i’ll leave you alone forever about this if my attention is unwanted.”
so simple, yet so wonderful in its basic human decency
It’s also worth mentioning that this isn’t a change in him. He begins his letter with a frosty assurance that this isn’t about pressuring her, and also it’d really be best if they mutually forgot about the whole thing, but he does have to defend himself against her accusations, and concludes with wishing her the best (as he also concluded their fight at Hunsford). The only reason they ever meet again is because Elizabeth shows up on his front lawn.
This is what happens when a woman writes about women and not when men write about what they think women want
Well, women writing for women also spawned Edward “sometimes I watch you sleep” Cullen, and his even more disturbing BDSM doppelganger. And those are just products of the last fifteen years.
Jane Austen was an unusually talented woman with a lot of nuanced thoughts on male bullshit and the social pressure to put up with male bullshit. If anyone had an excuse for internalizing and making excuses for said bullshit, it’s a woman of her time and place, not ours. So the fact she channeled her observations and frustrations into some of the most iconic characters in the western literary canon is fucking amazing unto itself.
The fact that they not only meet modern standards for love stories that are neither sexist nor rapey, but still set the bar for them, basically puts her on the literary God Tier.
Reddit user TheABrown describes “nice guy” in literary terms and nails it:
A
friend of mine who is big into English literature has described a big
chunk of them as “The Mr Collinses of the world who are bewildered and
angry that not even Charlotte Lucas will have them now that she has more
options.”
For those who haven’t read Pride and Prejudice, Mr Collins is a
character who has a decent income, isn’t vicious, but he’s annoying and
unpleasant. After being rejected by the heroine, he marries another
woman called Charlotte Lucas, who marries him because she’s getting
older, not likely to have another proposal, and is worried about living
the rest of her life as the maiden aunt in genteel poverty dependent on
her father or brother. [source]
I also like the second comment:
I mean, the feckless Wickhams of the world will always attract the silly Lydias; and the genuinely decent and honourable Bingleys and Darcys seem to find their Janes and Elizabeths – but the modern Charlottes – well, lots of them, now that it’s socially acceptable, and financially viable, to be single, would much prefer to spend the rest of their lives living in their own little one-bedroom flats, working their sensible, modestly renumerated jobs, and spending their evenings with friends, pizza, wine, and their pet cats if their options for marriage and partnership are Mr Collinses, regardless of whether Mr Collins has a respectable career or a nice house in the suburbs.
The Mr Collinses are (usually) not vicious or nasty or even objectively a terrible life decision (like a Wickham), but most Charlottes don’t want to spend their lives with them if there’s another option.
The other problem of course is that a lot of Mr Collinses are under some sort of delusion that they’re Mr Darcy/Mr Bingley/Mr Knightley etc.
I think the best definition of a “Nice Guy” is “Someone who’s convinced he’s Mr. Darcy but is really Mr. Collins.”
You must know… surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I’d scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.
i just watched the 2005 pride and prejudice FOR THE FIRST TIME and i am UNBELIEVABLY DELICATE ABOUT IT. i didn’t think i had it in me to care about regency era straights but HERE I AM, mascara stained and HIGHLY ATTACHED. when he flexed his hand after touching her i LITERALLY FELT GRAVITY ABANDON ME. 2005 was so long ago what have i been DOING that was MORE IMPORTANT THAN THIS MOVIE? NOTHING
I could easily forgive his pride, if he had not mortified mine. (Pride and Prejudice, 2005)
Elizabeth: How did it begin? Mr. Darcy: I cannot fix the hour, or the spot, or the look. It was too long ago and I was in the middle before I knew I had begun.
fivepercent 