Be careful how comfortable you get with jokes that cut yourself down and emphasize the false concept that there’s no hope for your future and life is pointless. I get that talking about struggles is important and helps in not feeling alone. There has to be a line though, between “hey here’s something that’s rough so I’m gonna laugh about it” and cheering each other on as you hammer unhealthy concepts deeper into your mind. You are not worthless. You are not ugly. You are not trash. Good is absolutely possible in your future. Don’t forget that words have power. Be careful how much poison you throw in your own well.
I’ll be honest: there are times when I resent this kind of advice. Things sometimes do seem hopeless and unchanging.
Except he’s right. “Be careful how much poison you throw in your own well.”
Tag: good things
I’m ok. I’m gonna be ok. I’m gonna live a beautiful life and I’ll get to know beautiful people. I will create things of beauty and be surrounded by flowers. And I’ll love myself, and I’ll be soft, I’ll be kind. And I’ll be ok.
more things like this in 2k17 please
over coffee with my mom this morning: “sometimes we hesitate to invite people into our life because we feel like our space isn’t good enough yet. things are a little messy, or our place settings don’t match, or our situation isn’t quite what we want it to be. don’t let that stop you. invite people in anyway.”
Forget Self-Esteem—Try Self-Compassion Instead
“Khazan: So what is self-compassion? How is it better?
Neff: It means treating yourself with the same kind of kindness, care, compassion, as you would treat those you care about—your good friends, your loved ones.One component is self-kindness, which is in a way the most obvious. But it also entails a recognition of common humanity—in other words, the understanding that all people are imperfect, and all people have imperfect lives. Sometimes, when we fail, we react as if something has gone wrong—that this shouldn’t be happening. “I shouldn’t have failed, I shouldn’t have had this issue come up in my life.” And this sense that “this shouldn’t be happening,” as if everyone else in the world were living perfectly happy, unproblematic lives. That type of thinking really causes a lot of additional suffering, because people feel isolated and separated from the rest of humanity.So, when we have self-compassion, when we fail, it’s not “poor me,” it’s “well, everyone fails.” Everyone struggles. This is what it means to be human. And that really radically alters how we relate to failure and difficulty. When we say, “Oh, this is normal, this is part of what it means to human,” that opens the door to the grow from the experience. If we feel like it’s abnormal, this shouldn’t be happening, then we start blaming ourselves.”
My therapist told me about this!! It’s a really great tool to use
Shout out to anyone like me with literally no actual friends to hang out with and go places, people with no crazy stories about how their weekend went, people who can’t relate to “squad” / “gang” jokes cause they never had a squad or a gang to chill with…people who only have themselves, people who’ve been alone from the jump, people who’ve been outcasted by society, people who have more internet friends than real life friends… at the end of the day we all have each-other and I can relate!
please be gentle with yourself. you’re trying. if it’s taking you longer than you thought to achieve something or get somewhere that’s okay. try not to compare yourself to others too much because not everyone gets to where they need to be right away. you’re alive that’s what matters. keep trying. you’ll get there.
Positive parts of 2016
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
– the rise of old friends senior dog sanctuary
– Hamilton
– pokemon go
– female ghostbusters
– i don’t give a fuck im outta here Obama
– captain america civil war
– girl, black guy and latino guy leads in new star wars
– deadpool
– lemonade
– literally???! Nothing??? Else????WELL ACTUALLY SINCE YOU ASKED:
– 500 elephants were relocated to a better, safer and bigger home.
– We made massive strides in Alzheimers’ prevention.
– This therapy could cure radiation sickness.
– The Anglican church resolved to solemnize same-sex unions the same as opposite-sex unions, which required a super-majority of all three orders of the church (lay, clergy, bishop) and got MORE than that from both lay and bishop.
– The Liberal gov’t changed the Canada Child Benefit so that it’s actually helping people who NEED THE FUCKING HELP. (I am sorry if you are a six figure income you do not actually fucking need this make some fucking lifestyle adjustments for fuck’s sake.)
– Highway of Tears is finally getting some regular fucking bus service.
– Eastwood donated a bunch more land to the Carmel River restoration project.
– We have developed gene-therapy for autoimmune disorders.
– Precision treatments for cancer are hitting clinical trials and WORKING.
– Dentists are once again providing free care to veterans who need it.
– Canada is actively attempting to increase and improve refugee resettlement.
– This guy got to see his kids again.
– Net Neutrality has been upheld by the appeals court. (No that fight isn’t over BUT THIS IS STILL A FUCK OF A GOOD THING.)
– We may have cured MS. (LET ME REPEAT: WE MAY HAVE CURED MS.)
– New short-treatment-period cure for HepC is huge success.
– Rise Women’s Legal Centre opened.
… . and this is just what I came up with in a pretty lazy google search in an hour, including distractions where I went down the research rabbit-hole for a bit because holy crap some of that stuff’s NEAT, guys!
And I know I’m missing stuff, because I wanted a citation for every single thing I put on there.
Yes, there have been some really bad things that have happened in 2016. There have also been a number of huge fucking miracles, and SIMILAR bad things have always happened, just about every damn year – maybe not to you, or maybe they didn’t make the news, and maybe you just don’t remember any of the good because of that whole massive Negative Bias problem that human brains have, but?
A lot of good shit happened. A lot.
And like I do actually get the sudden overwhelmed feeling of EVERYTHING SUCKS? but that mindset is, at this point, literally our worst enemy. “Everything is terrible somebody do something” helplessness is what will in fact consign us to everything BEING terrible.
Everything is not terrible. In fact there are new ways, every single month, wherein new opportunities and miracles are happening and no that does not balance out the bad shit but it gives every reason to FIGHT the bad shit, and to get past the bad shit, and to make sure the bad shit ISN’T the overwhelming stain.
So.
I want EVERY single one of my followers to read this. PLEASE I know a lot of bad things happened this year and it’s ok to be upset but all of this pessimism is only making things worse
Why? Because what America needs right now is more love!
6/13/2016- Love
This was a little haphazard to put together. It started as a general comic about love after a really bad few weeks for me, and it had to evolve from there. I wanted to try to make something positive and inclusive. I hope this is just that.
However, I don’t want to deter the conversation from the fact that there was a hate crime committed yesterday against the LGBTQIA/Latin-American community and fifty lives were lost. Here are ways you can help Orlando, protest the blood Ban on queer men, also How to help Trans people of Color. (They were written by a dear friend of mine and Queer writer Katie Dupere; this comic is for her). ❤
fivepercent 